The empathy we carry

Why do we feel empathy for inanimate objects or even villains with a sad backstory? 

Empathy is the ability to put yourself in the other person’s shoe, and understand and share their feelings. You might have been moved by a villain with a tragic backstory in a movie or felt compelled to buy a lopsided plushie just because you didn’t want it to be left behind.

This particular tendency to project human like feelings and emotions onto inanimate objects is known as anthropomorphizing. This is why we end up feeling bad for a stuffed toy, or start talking to our plant as if it can actually hear us. 

Why does this happen? 

Humans make sense of their surroundings using their own past experiences and emotions. When we come across objects that seem sad or lonely, we sometimes end up projecting our own feelings onto it—especially if we have felt such feelings of rejection and abandonment in the past. We do not just see the inanimate object as it is, we sometimes end up seeing our own reflection in the object.

Empathy may also come more easily with familiarity. It becomes easier to connect with someone, or something, if you’ve gone through similar feelings yourself. That’s why a person who has felt unaccepted or rejected may be drawn to the misfit in a story, or the imperfect plushie no one else might choose. The fictional villains don’t start seeming so bad once we start understanding the pain and trauma behind their choices. Despite their wrong actions, their feelings seem real and familiar, sometimes hitting close to home.

According to Dr. Melissa Shepard, a psychiatrist in Maryland, treating inanimate objects as if they  have their own feelings and thoughts could indicate a human desire to connect. When people feel lonely or disconnected from others, anthropomorphizing objects can become a way to fill these emotional gaps and create a sense of closeness even if it’s imaginary.

This is also why we struggle to throw away old belongings. That jacket you’ve kept for years, is not just a jacket, it’s something that holds memories and nostalgia from a certain period in your life, involving yourself and the countless experiences you have had. Throwing it away may feel like letting go of a part of yourself and the life you have lived during that time. 

Empathizing with inanimate things or complex fictional characters isn’t harmful or irrational, it’s normal, it’s human. It shows how beautiful human emotions are and how powerfully they shape the way we see the world.